Tri-california Events Blog Triathlete Jessica Frazier - A Model of Strength

By: Jessica Frazier | Silicon Valley Tri Club memberIt's only May, but 2016 has already become the year that I have stepped out of my comfort zone and pushed my limits more than ever before. So far, I've ridden farther and climbed more hills than I had ever imagine possible. All this, however, doesn't happen without the help of some pretty stellar, intimidating (but also way awesome) women! The results: the euphoric exhaustion of exhilarating downhill descents, breathtaking views, new friendships, and overcoming a major personal challenge.Add on to that list a photo shoot with #TeamBetty2016. Having battled and overcome an eating disorder, I would never have imagined myself willingly modeling in front of a camera. But representing Betty Designs, a team that embraces strong, healthy athletes, gave me the confidence to step into the light and be proud of my own strong body.While instinctively I would have chosen to wear the team leggings or a long-sleeved jacket, I was instead photographed wearing the team bathing suit. This may not sound particularly challenging or limit pushing for the average athlete, but to me it was a meaningful victory. It terrified me that people would see my body and judge it negatively. But standing there in front of the camera wearing only a swimsuit proved to me and to the world that this time I had won - not my eating disorder.Six years ago I started a treatment program for my eating disorder. I can say that I've been in recovery for the last three years, but it's only now that I've stepped out of my comfort zone and have decided to share my story publicly in hopes that it can help others find a path home as well. Triathlon played a critical role in my treatment and recovery. I can't say where I would be without this sport.When I first began treatment, I was barely functioning on 800 calories a day while working out for 60-90 minutes five times a week. I grew desperate to break free of the focus on food and the negative emotions that overwhelmed me at each mealtime. I recognized I had a problem and reached out to a team of doctors for help. They immediately put me on a path to consume more calories in a balanced way and adjust my activity to meet my caloric intake. If I worked out more, I ate more. Period.After my body started to recover from the immediate damage I had done to it, I was still struggling with unhealthy emotions around mealtime and food. In order to fully recover, I needed to transform my relationship with food. I also desperately needed to be involved in a supportive community. Due to my healthier habits, I now had energy to invest in meeting new people and picking up a new activity. Enter triathlon.When I told my doctors that I wanted to train for a triathlon, they were extremely supportive and worked with me to make sure I had the right nutrition, remained injury free, and avoided overtraining. I also joined a local triathlon club (shout out to SVTC!) and quickly grew comfortable with my fellow teammates who were looking for friends, training partners, and a cheering section at races! I looked forward to team training sessions and events, and relished in the enthusiasm that everyone had for the sport.I also quickly realized that that only way I was going to support my training, grow stronger, and have a snowball's chance of being competitive was to eat allllll the things! Now surrounded by incredible teammates and with a new goal to reach, I began growing accustomed to mealtimes as opposed to dreading them. Shortly after that, I started to look forward to mealtimes! Even after that, I became an active participant in choosing the right foods for me without the guidance of my dietitian. The real challenge for me, however, was being able to choose something off of a menu that I WANTED... not something I thought I "should" eat. (Anyone that has struggled with, or currently struggles with an eating disorder knows the relief and normalcy you feel when you can finally choose a hamburger and fries off the menu and enjoy it instead of torturing yourself with anxiety and guilt.) That last step took me another year, but it happened AT LAST... and it happened at the end of a 70.3-mile race. Yay! Ice cream!Tri-California races perfectly represent everything that drew me to triathlon to begin with: friends, overcoming challenges, having fun, and being involved in a truly supportive community. In 2015 (my first year as a Californian), I got to race the epic Wildflower course, push myself up steep hills, reward myself with a day of music, lounge on the grass with fellow competitors and new friends, and do a bit of shopping at the festival's very complete expo. My favorite moment of 2015 was racing with Scott Tinley and chilling with him after the race. Scott Tinley's Triathlon was a perfect low-key race to end a very challenging season.????2016 has already started strong and I'm looking forward to going full-force at the Pacific Grove Triathlon in June. I can't wait to jump in the water with sea otters and absorb the beauty of the California coastline. Without a doubt, triathlon was a turning point in my life and am I grateful that Tri-California continues to provide an outlet for me to grow my passion in the sport. It breathed vitality and confidence back into me, helped me form new friendships, and rediscover my passion for ice cream... and turned me into a swimsuit model.Share|